I hate you. Christ teaches us that we should forgive, but I don't want to forgive you, I WANT to hate you. I want to HURT you. I want to cause you immeasurable pain, and even that would not make up for what you did to me. I want to give you the same drug you gave me, and then shred your penis, slowly, one thin slice at a time, while you watch helplessly, as I watched you. Maybe I should cut it off, and ask you if YOU "want to suck it," you sick demented FUCK. I want to hurt you in every way imaginable.

You are not even human to me. You are less than scum. You are a disgusting putrid THING that does not deserve to be allowed on this planet.

I hope you are dead, and rotting in hell for all eternity. I hope your life until you die is a living hell. I hope you didn't do it to anyone else, but if you did, I hope they had the sense, strength, and courage to do what I could not. I hope you've spent YEARS rotting in jail being some big fat guy's bitch, being brutally and painfully raped daily the entire time! There aren't words to describe my hatred for you! But, hate you I do!

I was too young, too naive to know about things like "Date rape drugs." I was THIRTEEN!!!! I was a virgin, and I was planning to stay that way until I got married. You ruined not only that, you ruined my life. Then you had the audacity to tell people that *I* seduced you?!?!? You worthless PIG! How can you live with yourself, you who destroyed a young girl's life?

I had the intelligence and the confidence to be anything I wanted to be until you destroyed me. I could have gotten scholarships to the best schools. I could have been living a great life now. Instead, I dropped out of school because I couldn't face it. I gave myself to men because I thought I was worthless. I lost my children because of the emotional damage you caused me. My life has been a living hell, and no amount of pain can do justice for what you did to me.

You were the adult! You were THIRTY-SIX!!! How could you do that to anyone at all, but especially to a little girl almost 1/3 your age?!?!?

Nineteen years later, I still have the emotional scars. I still can't have a "normal" love life. I still can't stand to be touched in any way that reminds me of what you did to me. I still feel dirty and disgusting if a man even looks at me sexually. I hate you.

Above all, I want you to truly know that you ruined 19 years of my life. I won't allow you to continue to ruin it, but if there's any way possible that I can ruin yours, believe me, I'd do it!